Sorrow the Eye Can't See

I'll tell you what. People have trials! And it can be so hard to see sometimes, even in the people you are closest to. I have been blessed with the opportunity lately to be allowed to know about the sorrows of those around me. I have been praying for opportunities to serve others and Heavenly Father has answered my prayers. I have learned that there is so much beneath the surface. I didn't even know that my roommate was having a hard time a few days ago until she opened up to me. The same has been true in at least four other instances lately. I'm grateful that these people have let me into their lives - some of the most tender aspects of their lives. It has given me fulfillment that I haven't found elsewhere.

(Russian Accent) Hiello.

Caitlin, this one is for you.

HHHHHI.

I am writing this because you are one of the only people who will probably ever read this.

I hope your ulcer is doing well. And by that I mean, I hope you ulcer is being destroyed and that you are doing well.

I luff you.

I mees you.

Also

My papers are in! My call should come by NEXT WEEK. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS ALL SO CRAZY

P.S. I have new tabs! You will notice right above this post are tabs "Home", "Tips for Life", and "Powerhouse Words". There are nuggets of wisdom there, if I do say so myself! ESPECIALLY in the quotes. Holla!

Earthly Father, Heavenly Father

I love this video! I was thinking about my dream life yesterday and I realized that it would be a lot like this one. Preferably with a mint-colored Ford truck from the fifties. :)

How to Really Change

This has been a powerhouse week. On Tuesday I finished my papers and submitted them to the bishop! Ahh! So exciting and scary! I'll tell you what, the adversary worked on me really hard that day. I expected it a little bit because my roommate told me that's how it was for her before she left for the mission. She was right! haha. I was filled with doubts and passivity. All from the adversary. Finally, I called my brother about an hour before I had my appointment and he helped me through and broke down the lies the adversary was trying to get me to believe. He likened the First Vision to how I was feeling. He asked what Joseph Smith did when the adversary tried to bind his tongue.

me: "He prayed."
him: "Nope, what did he do?"
me: "He prayed."
him: "Nope, he prayed HARDER and HARDER."

He talked about how the adversary knew this was going to be a good thing and he was trying to stop it, just like he did when Joseph Smith was about to say a prayer that would change the world forever. It was such a good conversation; it strengthened me and helped me see clearly. After that I texted my family and asked if they would all pray for me. They did, and I felt it. My mum, especially. She told me that she had been cross-country skiing at the time and she knelt down and poured out her heart to Heavenly Father and the Savior for me. Mothers' prayers are so powerful and it's making me cry just thinking about it! I know that on my mission those prayers will sustain me.

Another thing that has made this week so good has been the inspiration I've gotten. A few days ago I had the inspiration that if I want my scripture study to be effective, I need to have a purpose for each study session instead of just reading. You'd think I would have thought of that after 20 years of living! But I never had. haha. So I started doing it and my scripture study has become so much richer! I highly highly recommend it to all of you. It will help you love the scriptures! Also, pray before you study, asking to have the Spirit during your study, and ask specifically to be led in your question or purpose for that day's study. I have also come to see the importance of studying the scriptures every day for half an hour (as asked of us by my stake president)! That was quite a stretch from five minutes a day during high school, but I have come to love it, and nothing less is adequate for me now. As my bishop told me once, it takes about 15 minutes to even get into really focusing on studying scriptures! Also, our stake president asked us to study in the morning, because the scriptures give us the Spirit, which we need all day, not just right before we fall asleep! I'm sure there are different circumstances out there for everyone, but scripture study is one of the most important things we can do. Make it a priority and see the Lord bless your life!

So, a few days ago I was discouraged. I felt completely stuck in my ways, like nothing I try to do will change me. So I took that concern to my scripture study. ONE OF THE MOST POWERFUL SCRIPTURE STUDIES I HAVE EVER HAD! First I searched through the Topical Guide about change. I was led to Mosiah 5:2. This is right after the Book of Mormon king, King Benjamin, gave his last words of counsel to his people before he passed away. After his powerful words, he asked his people if they believed his words - "And they all cried with one voice, saying: Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually."

So I learned that change is possible, and it comes from the Spirit. I also learned that true change comes from our desires being changed, not just the fruits of our desires, our actions, being changed.

So my next question was "How do I change my desires?"

I learned that this desire to do good comes from faith. Next question: "How do I grow in faith?"

I was somehow led to a page on lds.org about faith, and one of the headings said "How can I increase my faith?" Heavenly Father was definitely aware of me. This page said to grow in faith requires us to pray for faith, to live the Savior's teachings, and (most important to me that day) studying the scriptures. It quoted Romans 10:17 - "So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God."

There is was! True change comes from the Spirit and desire. Desire comes from faith. And faith and the Spirit come from studying the scriptures!

Since then, I have tried to spend more time in the scriptures and all the good resources the Church gives us. I have felt the Spirit a lot stronger and I have come to love the scriptures more! I promise you that if you have a purpose to your study and spend more time in the scriptures, you will feel the Spirit more and have a greater desire to do what is right!

If you want to live my life...

...listen to these two songs at least 17 times per day:

-Walk On By by Noosa
-Go Do by Jonsi

Moderation in all things?

Real Men

My feelings are tender tonight. I just finished watching 17 Miracles. Those Saints are so faithful. They were so strong; words cannot express that strongly enough. As I watched I thought about the trials they went through and I thought to myself, “How can I be as faithful as they were?”. They are worthy role models to aspire to be like. As President Hinckley said, we should never stop being grateful for them.

I want to talk about heroes.

There is a scene in the movie where several men volunteer to carry the rest of the company across the Sweetwater River in the dead of winter. That scene touched me deeply. They are real men. The greatest indicator of a real man is someone who selflessly sacrifices all that is required for the welfare of others. I think about the men in my life and what they would do if they were at Sweetwater River in the winter of 1856. I have no doubt in my mind that my brothers and father would be some of the first to volunteer, and that brings tears to my eyes. There are so many other men I know who would do the same. They are real men and I am deeply grateful for their strong, selfless characters. I am grateful for the Levi Savages in my life and someday I hope to marry one. Brothers, if any of you are reading this, know that I and other women are so grateful for your sacrifices, for your priesthood service, for your being stalwart in such a corrupted world. I’m sure life can be hard for you and that it can be difficult for you to stay strong. There may even be times that you have fallen. Know that we stand behind you and we’ll do all we can to help you.